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Welder
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Joined: 02 Jan 2007
Posts: 2655
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 Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 11:37 am Post subject: |
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| Lethal.Ambition wrote: | | Warface wrote: | 4/18/08
A hack golfer spends a day at a plush country club, playing golf and enjoying the luxury of a complimentary caddy. Being a hack golfer, he plays poorly all day. Round about the 18th hole, he spots a lake off to the left of the fairway. He looks at the caddy and says, "I've played so poorly all day, I think I'm going to go drown myself in that lake."
The caddy looks back at him and says, "I don't think you could keep your head down that long." |
I don't get it  |
You're not the only one..
_________________
Lethal Ambition: I'd hit it
Jonza: yeah? and i'd remove your manhood with a blowtorch.
| LlamaFarmer wrote: | Everybody here at FG are so fkin weird.
Its like coming home for the first time to meet your real family after finding out your adopted. You feel like you fit in, but everybody still scares the bejezuz out of ya. |
| SmokE wrote: | | I hope Lethal's penis is bigger than that |
| mdawgmike wrote: | | Also SmokE is one hot tamale. If only I was a woman or gay... |
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SmokE
Site Admin
Joined: 02 Jan 2007
Posts: 2301
Location: In Welder's mom.
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| Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 11:55 am Post subject: |
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It's golf humor.
The caddy was saying that the golfer didn't keep his head down while swinging the club on each shot.
This joke is for typical white people
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| Gabizzle wrote: | | I'm humping you Smoke. |
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Guerrilla Gorilla
First Sergeant
Joined: 29 Nov 2007
Posts: 296
Location: Oregon
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| Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 2:36 pm Post subject: |
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| SmokE wrote: | It's golf humor.
The caddy was saying that the golfer didn't keep his head down while swinging the club on each shot.
This joke is for typical white people |
Yeah, because we all know only white people know about and golf, right? 
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Just another dirty borracho.
Last update: 05/07 | Next update: I dunno
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[-aRcTiC-]
I Donated!
Joined: 02 Jan 2007
Posts: 1356
Location: cmd
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| Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 2:41 pm Post subject: |
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white collar joke?
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Lethal.Ambition
General
Joined: 03 Jan 2007
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Location: Florida
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GregJ
Lt. General
Joined: 02 Jan 2007
Posts: 1538
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| Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 5:54 pm Post subject: |
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lol. is funny cause i got that joke right away, spent 4 hours today with a few buds drinking and playing a around of 18. very nice day today. got up to 78F!!!
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Warface
Site Admin
Joined: 21 Mar 2007
Posts: 625
Location: San Diego, CA
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| Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 7:04 pm Post subject: |
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4/19/08
There was a baby born in the hospital and he weighed ten pounds. The odd thing about him was his body weighed five pounds and his balls weighed five pounds. All the nurses and even the doctor didn't know what to do with him.
Then, the chief surgeon walked in and asked what was wrong. The head nurse replied, ''We don't know what to do with this baby.''
So the chief surgeon took one look and said, "You should put him into a mental institution."
''Why?' asked the head nurse.
"Well," replied the chief surgeon, "take a look at him. The boy is obviously half nuts."
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Warface
Site Admin
Joined: 21 Mar 2007
Posts: 625
Location: San Diego, CA
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| Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 7:04 pm Post subject: |
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4/20/08
Why are New Yorkers always depressed?
The light at the end of their tunnel is New Jersey.
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Warface
Site Admin
Joined: 21 Mar 2007
Posts: 625
Location: San Diego, CA
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| Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 7:05 pm Post subject: |
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4/21/08
A salesman from KFC walked up to the Pope and offers him a million dollars if he would change "The Lord's Prayer" from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our daily chicken." The Pope refused his offer.
Two weeks later, the man offered the pope 10 million dollars to change it from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our daily chicken" and again the Pope refused the man's generous offer. Another week later, the man offered the Pope 20 million dollars and finally the Pope accepted. The following day, the Pope said to all his officials, "I have some good news and some bad news. 'The good news is, that we have just received a check for 20 million dollars. The bad news is, we lost the Wonder Bread account!'''
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Guerrilla Gorilla
First Sergeant
Joined: 29 Nov 2007
Posts: 296
Location: Oregon
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| Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 7:23 pm Post subject: |
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hahahaha...... half nuts..... hahahah.......... new jersey...... mmmmm........ kfc
Is wonder bread even still around? Because either they aren't or the grocery stores I frequent no longer sell the brand. Just curious.
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Just another dirty borracho.
Last update: 05/07 | Next update: I dunno
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SmokE
Site Admin
Joined: 02 Jan 2007
Posts: 2301
Location: In Welder's mom.
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| Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 8:44 pm Post subject: |
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These are step by step instructions to catch a polar bear:
1. Ensure that the ice is strong enough to support both yours and the bears weight
2. Cut a 10' dia hole in the ice
3. Place green peas in a circular pattern around the hole, spacing them about 1' apart (this will take ~ 30 green peas)
4. When the Polar Bear comes to take a pea, kick him in the ice-hole.
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| Gabizzle wrote: | | I'm humping you Smoke. |
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SmokE
Site Admin
Joined: 02 Jan 2007
Posts: 2301
Location: In Welder's mom.
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| Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 8:48 pm Post subject: |
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Here's the other polar bear joke I know:
This baby polar bear was sat with his mom on an ice berg.
"Mom," he asked, "am I a real polar bear?"
"Yes darling, of course you are." his mother answered.
"Yeah but, am I really a polar bear, you know, a real one?"
"Yes dear," his mom replied, "You're dad is a polar bear, I'm a polar bear and your sister's a polar bear."
"I know that mom," he said, "but am I really a polar bear?"
"Of course you are" said his mom, "now shut up and eat your penguin."
A minute later the baby polar bear asks "Mom, I know what you've said, but am I really a proper polar bear?"
"Look," she says, "you are really polar bear alright. What's wrong with you? Why do you keep asking me that?"
"Well," he replies, "I'm fucking freezing!"
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| Gabizzle wrote: | | I'm humping you Smoke. |
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Warface
Site Admin
Joined: 21 Mar 2007
Posts: 625
Location: San Diego, CA
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| Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:12 pm Post subject: |
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4/23/08
An old man and a young man work together in an office. The old man always has a jar of peanuts on his desk, and the young man really loves peanuts.
One day, while the old man is away from his desk, the young man yields to temptation and scarfs down over half of the contents of the jar. When the old man returns, the young man feels guilty and confesses to his crime.
"Don't worry, son. I never eat the peanuts anyway," the old man replies. "Since I lost my teeth, all I can do is gum chocolate off the M&M's."
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Warface
Site Admin
Joined: 21 Mar 2007
Posts: 625
Location: San Diego, CA
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| Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:12 pm Post subject: |
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4/24/08
Q: How many men does it take to screw a light bulb into a socket?
A: One -- because men will screw anything.
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Warface
Site Admin
Joined: 21 Mar 2007
Posts: 625
Location: San Diego, CA
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| Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2008 9:49 am Post subject: |
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4/25/08
A man left his cat with his brother while he went on vacation for a week. When he came back, the man called his brother to see when he could pick the cat up. The brother hesitated, then said, ''I'm so sorry, but while you were away, the cat died."
The man was very upset and yelled, ''You know, you could have broken the news to me better than that. When I called today, you could have said he was on the roof and wouldn't come down. Then when I called the next day, you could have said that he had fallen off and the vet was working on patching him up. Then when I called the third day, you could have said he had passed away.''
The brother thought about it and apologized.
"So how's Mom?" asked the man.
"She's on the roof and won't come down."
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]-->
